Okay, I'm thinking about giving up on Val. I've been trying for months now to hook up with her and I'm getting no where. Maybe we’ll just have to be friends. We can't even keep a simple 'happy hour' date; although they're not really official dates, just hanging out time. One of two things will happen; some last minute emergency with her kids will come up and she'll have to cancel so she can take them to baseball practice, or pick them up from their grandmothers or work with them on a last minute school projects or their dad just can't get away to take them on 'his' night for the kids. Her two little boys have been cock blocking me for months now and I'm sick of it.
Next time I date a woman with kids I'm gonna do what another guy did and date a woman who doesn't have custody and just load of free time. The other thing that has gotten in the way is my fucking job. This rat’s nest has hit an all time low now that it's affecting my love life or more accurately blocking the development of one. Too many times have I tried to get out of here to see Val and I get caught with some last minute bullshit. Nobody was thinking about me all fucking week and then its 40 minutes till I'm out the door and BANG! Gotcha sucker! I guess that Val is interested in me, I can never really tell if women are digging me, or just kinda like me, or just being nice but really want me to go away. Doesn’t matter, I need to start looking elsewhere anyways.
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My friends are jerks, all of them, in one way or fashion or another they are jerks. I guess I attract jerky people, because I’m a pretty jerky person myself. I have jerky friends and yet it still surprises me when any of them start acting like a really big jerk or start liking like a jerk to me.
I’ve known this guy named Chris for a long time and there’s a lot to tell but I don’t want to take all day with it so long story short. Chris is dating a woman named Kendra; Kendra has 3 kids (more MILF drama); Chris doesn’t like kids but fakes the funk to get the girl; Kendra finally realizes it and tells Chris to shit or get off the pot, Chris doesn’t shit, Kendra kicks him off the pot; Chris stops talking to ME because of his break up with Kendra since he knows I’m not gonna listen to sob stories about his inability to commit; Kendra comes to ME to cry on my shoulder since I’ve always known what kinda jerk Chris was and now she can spill her guts; Kendra gets it out of her system and is now too busy to talk to ME since all the crying is done; I say “FUCK’EM” about both of them and go own with my life; Kendra and Chris are friends again but see I not dealing with them; Kendra offers lame weak ass hand in friendship; I continue to go about my life my free and clean of two jerks.
The moral of the story is: If you got jerks for friends, then you need to be the biggest jerk of them all.
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I took my P90X before pictures and God do I look gross! There’s’ nothing that looks worst then a ‘skinny-fat’ man. My arms and legs are thin and under developed, I’m growing bitch tits, I’ve got a big frog like pouch under my chin, not enough for a double chin but enough to fat out my head and face, and there’s the gut… That huge man pregger bulge that looks like I’m ready to drop a 20lb 8 month old baby. The lame ass crunches that I’ve been doing for years have only gone as far as adding definition to my gut by highlighting where muscle should be and keeping the fat broken up on those areas, instead of one big mass of fat.
So I’ve been working out for a little over a month and I’ve got good new and bad news.
Good news is that I’ve lost 10lbs last month, down to 175. I’m easily fitting into pants I haven’t worn in years. I feel better psychically and mentally about me and just things in general. I was seriously thinking about getting anti-depressants some time ago but fuck that shit now. If I’m blue, I know what to do! I’m seeing small signs of muscle development and I feel my arms and legs getting tighter and stronger.
Bad news is that I’ve been working out for a little over a month and half of that time I skipped my workout. I’ve been keeping a workout log like the said and out of the 35 days I’ve been on the program, I skipped 18 days. Not all in a row, but a day here, a day there, a whole weekend here, 3 days on, 1 day off, 2 days on, 2 days off and the time adds up. Meaning the great results I gotten already could have been double if I kept up with it better.
This adds to the good news in that I know what to do and that when it’s done right, it works and best of all I know I can do it.
